What do you call a firefighter who is really bad at their job? Q: Why was it taking so long for the fire fighters to get to the strawberry farm? "Wonderful ! She waited outside as she anxiously waited to watch her son in action. "No silly, they use the dogs to find the fire hydrant!". Knock knock. What did the fireman say to the chairman of the small-town football club, who had asked him to save the cups, when the fire started in the stadium? A guy calls the fire department and says, Ive just had my front yard landscaped, I have a nice new flower bed, a new fish pond with a fountain and a new rose garden.. Thank you for taking the time to share your feedback with us! Firetruck. Mailman = Mailfighter A: Step 1, Step 2, Step 3, The fire chief tried to pickup new fire hydrants, but she wasnt allowed to park anywhere near the factory. Why were the Three Wise Men actually firemen?Because they had come from afire! What sports team do firefighters root against? A. A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Fire-Fighter Pickup Lines - Use These at the Fire Station! These jokes are funny for parents, children, teachers, emergency pesonnel and firefighters. In the world of magic, what could you also call a water bender? "If you dare to come close, I'll knock you out!". Eventually they go home together, the next day the mans mom calls. Let us know what you think! A: He used a hotline. Why did the coffee call 911? Q: When are firefighters best at getting out of the fire station quickly in the middle of the night? When can one say that a firefighter is down? How do you know that a firefighter is really good at their job? Scroll down through these brilliants puns which can also be used as firefighter captions and firefighter one-liners. A Mexican fireman had two sons. What happens when a firefighter visits a new place or meets new people? << We have over 150 Categories of Pick Up Lines on our Main Page! Q: What sound do you hear when dragons sneeze? A firefighter died one day and unfortunately went to hell. Why was the fireman late for work during the power failure emergency? A third child concluded. Once you are finished reading them, give the best jokes your vote and share this article with your friends! 2. How do you put out a fire? The consent submitted will only be used for data processing originating from this website. Charlies Favourite Funny BBQ Quotes [Dad Joke Lovers Welcome] Why was the man who worked in a hydrant plant always late at his work? "From now on when I say BELL 1, I want you to strip naked. One liner tags: attitude, communication, life. A little while goes by. From the distance a long siren was heard and another fire truck came into sight. Save the cups cries George. Please enter your email to complete registration. It was a shitzu. Why did the rookie bring his bowling ball to the fire station? 85 Best Firefighter Jokes And Puns That Are Lit | Kidadl How do most firefighters do their hair? "I have always wondered about when a firefighter loses his job, is he fired, or does he get the ax!". "Fantastic ! Jerry Seinfeld. What?!? Army soldiers are perfectly equipped to be a firefighter.This is because they are used to taking fire! (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Write CSS OR LESS and hit save. Why does a firefighter love eating Tamale? "BELL 2 rings and we all slide down the pole. Why was the pandemic bad for the firefighters? Awesome Puns Related To Firefighters Scroll down through these brilliants puns, which can also be used as firefighter captions and firefighter one-liners! When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate. How do you know if a firefighter is at your party? Scroll down through these brilliants puns which can also be used as firefighter captions and firefighter one-liners. I correct them by saying it is actually warm! I can respond to a threat in one minute By not starting a fire in your kitchen. Bad at what theyre doing. Paramedics and EMTs can be staring down a life-or-death situation in the blink of an eye. The fire-fighter walked over to take a closer look. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. Clean jokes about firemen, firewomen and fire fighting. How do firefighters make sure they can slide down the pole easier in the event of an emergency? Two wrongs don't make a right, take your parents as an example. Why did the fireman resign from the department? This man is depriving a village somewhere of its idiot. " He's an accountant !" Military personnel share amazing one-liners from drill instructors. What's the similarity between a boat, a firefighter and a family? One-liners knock-knock jokes puns videos and things we think are worth sharing with other parents. Why did the fireman say that humans are like fire? Getting fired from work. What do you call the heroic fireman who was featured on the evening TV news? The only food that firemen like to get on a busy day is a hot dog! Manage Settings Short Firefighter Jokes - One liners, wit and puns What award do you give a firefighter? Caitlin Brink/USMC. How do you know that a firefighter is taking a break from work? The fire-fighter looked a little closer. Here are 105. Funny Firefighter Jokes My granddad always said you should fight fire with fire. I failed math so many times at school,. What did the fireman say to the chairman of the small-town football club, who had asked him to save the cups, when the fire started in the stadium?The firefighter informed him that the fire hadn't spread to the kitchen yet! A fire broke out at a cold-medicine factory on the outskirts of town.Thankfully, there was no congestion on the way. A: Engineers. Pilgrims. Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy. As normal, don't expect any originality or hilarity Your email address will not be published. You set my heart on fire. Fun Kids Jokes was created by parents as a safe place for other parents and their children to find something funny to giggle at. 2 Do not argue with an idiot. The man with a flame tattoo on his arms got rejected from the fire station. By eating a lot of fried foods at work. How do you get down from an aerial ladder? Source: Donnie Nunley/Flickr. ", "There was this firefighter that I had met for a few dates. Little boy that sure is a nice fire truck! the fireman says. Q: What bugs fire fighters during the summer months? The Ghostbusters. Firework Jokes Got my friend an unnecessarily large rocket this year. If you need some more material or just need to brighten up your day, here are 25 of the best engineering jokes from across the web. She was shocked. If a plumber's career also has the possibility of going down the drain, then can a firefighter's career go up in smoke? 143 Firefighter Jokes That Are Nothing But The Best Now, our selection of funny firefighter jokes starts a bit further down - you should definitely scroll there and check them out! What do you call a firefighter who smokes on the job? Now just tell us how to get there.The farmer says, Oh, dont you have that big red truck any more?, "They say if you cant stand the heat, get out of the kitchen Which is why I lost my job as a firefighter. A: FireCRACKERS. 3. How did the firefighter propose to his colleague from the fire department? To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you. 60+ Police Jokes And Puns So Funny They're Practically - Scary Mommy What should one do when a firefighter offers a person two ways to leave a house?The person should always go for the ladder! I would not breed from this Officer. Why do firefighters slide down the pole at a firestation? One to change the bulb and 3 to chop a hole in the roof. The girl had tied the wagon to her dog's collar and to the cat's testicles. It was much harder to find sexy accountants, lawyers or plumbers. You're about as useless as an asshole with tastebuds. Q. now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); What is the name of the machine that firemen used to detect any fire? 46 Firefighter Pick Up Lines [Funny, Dirty, Cheesy] Firefighters Jokes - Fireman Jokes - Jokes4us.com There are also firefighter puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls. Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's, We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide, social media features, and analyze our traffic. Why did the fireman bring a ladder to the restaurant? What sound do you hear when dragons sneeze?A fire alarm. Funny Firefighter Jokes What starts with f and ends with k? We suggest to use only working firefighter cops piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Which 'Game Of Thrones' character can be an excellent choice for a firefighter? How could the firefighters tell that their new chief was going to be stubborn?He whistled Hail to the Chief whenever he walked into a room. Why was the man arrested for pulling out five men from the burning building?This was because he had pulled out all the firefighters! Because the fires they have to fight are wearing orange. Firefighter Joke 16 One day a boy was drowning in a near by lake. Rest assured that this matter is discussed in these jokes about firefighters! Q: Why do they weigh fire fighters every day? Fire. What is the one thing that firefighters save during a fire?They always save the foundation! Always borrow money from a pessimist. Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth? Theyre the ones putting out the fires instead of starting them. One liner tags: family, insults, rude, sarcastic. He is wearing a firemans hat and has the wagon tied to a dog. Q: Which superhero was the fire department always trying to recruit? Whats inside most home fire extinguishers? One liner tags: insults. Come on, they're basically real-life heroes, rescuing kittens, helping damsels in distress, and fighting fires, among all the other things they do! I am like a firefighter Flame grilled. The children began discussing the dogs duties. How do you get down from an aerial ladder?You dont get down from an aerial ladder. A: The AFD. Q. "That sure is a nice fire truck," he said with admiration. It's autumn, not long before the clocks change, and Halloween is around the corner. Bad jokes and one liners - so bad that they are funny Me: I quit. Why do firefighters have a higher rate of cholesterol than other professionals? The cop and firefighter are checking out heaven together. Q: Why are there no picnic baskets at fire stations? 82.43 % / 3814 votes. One dark night outside a small town, a fire started inside the local chemical plant. 376 of the best one-liners on the internet The firefighter took part in the game show and reached the final.He was comfortable in playing the game because he was in the hot seat! What is the main difference between a firefighter and a worker?Only one out of them is scared of a firing! He really isn't cut out to be a fireman!". What did they call Bob the firefighter?Bob. Top 100 funniest one-liners 10-05-2009, 10:14 AM 1 I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesnt work that way. "Proof that we don't understand death is that we give dead people a pillow.". How are firemen and cops similar to each other? * Why do volunteer firefighters understand the importance of milliseconds? Whats every firefighters least favorite song? If you happen to see a firefighter, please let them know how much you appreciate their service. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness. The Best Funny BBQ Quotes I've Ever Heard! The fireman says Hey little boy. Why was it taking so long for the fire fighters to get to the strawberry farm? Funny Firefighters Quotes Fireman Sayings Phrases Why dont most firefighters smoke? Seriously, the Antarctic Fire Department (AFD) is based at McMurdo Station and is the only full-time professional fire department in Antarctica. Clean One Liner Jokes. One liner tags: life, puns. Q: How could the firefighters tell that their new chief was going to be stubborn? Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh. Why doesn't a fire chief look out the window in the morning? A fireman kicks down the door of a house and carries the family out 1 by 1, but there is no fire. The Fire Department of the City of New York (FDNY) is the largest Fire Department in the US. #1 for Parents and Teachers! Fireman Jokes One Liners. These jokes are popular year round and especially around Halloween time! A: Theyre used to looking at the bright side. Turns out, good players are hard to find. Why do you call a firefighter when theres a cat stuck in a tree? What did the man say when the fireman asked him how to reach his house on fire? Three . That afternoon the Deputy returned home exhausted, and plopped down dejectedly in his easy chair. Q. 75 Hilarious Golf Puns and One-Liners That Don't Suck As normal dont expect originality or hilarity. When do firefighters retire? Why? I just followed the instruction asking me to dice the onions. I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patients. A: Bob. A farmer call the rural fire department one day. So that cats and other animals can just go right up the same trees again. Steal these classic one-liner jokes in our collection of the best one-liner jokes from experts in funny like Milton Berle and Conan O . I sold my vacuum the other day. What happens if a firefighter throws too many housewarming parties?The police book them for arson! Take away the fact that there is immense multi-faceted advancement daily, and that feeling remains. 15 Funny Wedding Toasts & Jokes to Steal - The Knot Engineers on a train. Why do firefighters wear yellow uniforms in most parts of the world? What kind of ears will a fire pumper truck have? I will give $50,000 to the engine company that brings them out safely!. 143 Firefighter Jokes That Are Nothing But The Best Neilas urkus and Just Kairyt - Barkauskien If we had to choose the least funny profession, firefighters would be our top choice. Q: What did the directions to the fire department ladder say? Firefighters do it with their hoses ! Whats the most important way to extinguish a fire in your kitchen? Members of the military bonded over their service and took time to reminisce about harsh words from their drill instructors in an entertaining Reddit Military thread. Firefighter Jokes - Clean Firefighter Jokes - Fun Kids Jokes Jan 21 . The bartender sighs and says, "My life is a joke. Why were the Three Wise Men actually firemen? Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics), Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out, 30 Y.O. Your image is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB. For firefighters, what does the word chaos mean? The main rule of one-liners is in the name: it needs to be about one line. 23. What did he name them? (Pumper is another name for a fire engine that pumps water). And thats why Im no longer a firefighter.". document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); 50 Firefighter Jokes Thatll Sure Spark a Laugh, Creative Fire Puns That Will Make You Crackle, Creative Teacher Puns That Are Everything They're Chalked Up. The only reason I would take up jogging is so I could hear heavy breathing again. Flirt and start conversations with these pick up phrases to help you score that hot guy or girl! When the firefighter saw the church razing down, he said "Holy smoke!". How should you fight a fire? "He's just for good luck." Well, that is why I guess he lost his job as a firefighter! In the distance the other firemen watched as the old timers hopped off of their rig and began to fight the fire with an effort that they had never seen before. Why did the rookie bring his bowling ball to the fire station?He heard there was a strike team. My best job was being a musician, but eventually, I found I wasn't noteworthy. Hey girl! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here. Why doesn't the deputy firefighter look out of the window in the early morning? Q: Why did the rookie bring his bowling ball to the fire station? He felt so relieved to be saved. His wife, concerned by his appearance, asks if something went wrong with his game. The firefighter bends over to pick up his wings, and the cop's wings fall off. Fire yourself up with these awesome jokes and puns on firefighters! Anyone want to know how many firemen and firefighters' jokes are there?There are zero jokes about firefighters because they are all facts! He's the quarterback for the Dallas Cowboys, but I was too embarrassed to say that.". 2. Whats the most important part of a firefighters work gear that they can never afford to be without? The Chiefs Have Arrived On Scene. Why do firefighters wear yellow overalls with stripes? ", "Ever walk into a room and completely forget why you were in there? Q: What do you call a fire department in Antarctica? Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app. However, when it comes to barbecue I couldn't believe in anything more opposite. ~~~ Firemen are HOT stuff !! Why do firefighters in Greece make every fire worse?Because they are not supposed to be using water on Greece fires! Do firefighters have to train to jump higher than a fire hydrant? What starts most household fires? A one-liner, also known as a punchline in some cases, is a truly remarkable form of a joke. All men are created equal then a few become firemen. A. How do you spot a firefighter at a neighborhood barbecue? Firefighter jokes, riddles and puns for kids and adults of all ages. You could get to say that she is my new flame! On my desk, I have a work station.. 23. Four. Why did the man hug the fire exit and said everything was ok?It had a sign that said it was alarmed. Give a a fire company 3 new tools to try out and after 30 minutes one will be broken one will be lost and the other pregnant. When there is a trailer fire, what is the first thing to get off from the fire truck?A lawn chair! Whether you want to turn up the heat with fire one-liners or put out boredom fires with good flames jokes or simply enjoy the flaming humor to yourself. What should you call a fireman who is very motivated and pumped up? If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments. Velcro. Funny As Hell Sayings About Exercise - JokeQuote.com Fire Jokes Someone threw my 70s records on the fire. I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass. Little boy, says the fireman, I dont want to tell you how to run your fire truck, but if you were to tie that rope around the dogs neck I think you could go faster., The little boy says, Youre probably right mister, but then I wouldnt have a siren!. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? What sound do you hear when dragons sneeze? (Leans in real close) That means I talk down to people. "I dont understand how firefighters can trust a ladder Theyre always up to something. Utinsel. Respect for religion must be reestablished. Funny One-Liners 1. Me: I don't know when to quit. Keep it short and sweet so the audience stays on their toes. Start writing! Theyre the only person there who actually understands the fire. Then I realized he was just an arsonist.". 94 Best Funny Firefighter Quotes Humor ideas - Pinterest "The fireman said, 'The ladder. Because then he wouldn't have anything to do in the afternoon. The firefighter's wings fall off. When can one say that a firefighter is down?When the remote controller slips from his hand! What would happen if the fire chief and newbie jumped out of the house on fire one day?The chief would land first because the newbie would stop and ask others for directions. Funny bad jokes. Continue with Recommended Cookies. 50+ Creative Pancake Puns That Will Make You FLIP! Why is My 3 Year Old So Mean & When to Worry About It? A bar is burning to the ground and a team of firefighters rush in to put out the fire. It was a disco inferno. Because theyre naughty when nobody is looking at them. A firefighter swam out and pulled the boy up onto the beach and began CPR. A fire broke out at a cold-medicine factory on the outskirts of town. Hey Pandas, Post A Picture Of A Cat Being Naughty, 30 Pictures Of Beautiful Bangladeshi People By Mou Aysha (New Pics), 79 Surreal Images Of Sneakers Placed In Some Very Interesting Locations By Carlos Jimnez Varela. 25. What would happen if Franciscan priests became firefighters?Then, they would be fighting fires with the help of friars! A: Just in case the sauce on taco Tuesday was too fiery. but apparently a poll was taken and they all fell through a hole in the floor. Firefighter Jokes Firefighter Lovemaking Rules A firefighter came home from work one day and told his wife, "You know, we have a wonderful system at the fire station: Bell 1 rings and we all put on our jackets, Bell 2 rings and we all slide down the pole, Bell 3 rings and we're on the fire truck ready to go. So he installed a brass pole from my bedroom to the living room. Which type of fire is the wrong one to call the fire department over? 24. Keep your friends amused with these best fire puns that we've gathered for you. Short Firefighter Jokes One liners, wit and puns, 90 Irresistible Knock Knock Jokes about Food. Before I criticize a man, I like to walk a mile in his shoes. What award do you give a firefighter? What was the movie Firestarter really about? Lynette Gamble. 50 One-Liner Jokes That'd Leave You Rolling | Inspirationfeed How quickly can a forest fire start?Lightning fast! Clean fireman jokes and firewoman jokes for parents teachers firefighters. Those of you who have teens can tell them clean firefighter rescue dad jokes. Q: How did the firefighter find the fire? Very, very important for their health. What direction does an elevator move in when its on fire? 82.53 % / 355 votes. 40 Of Probably The Best One-Liner Jokes Ever | Bored Panda Joyous, the chemical company president announced that he would double the reward to $200,000 and walked over to personally thank each of the volunteers. Because then he wouldnt have anything to do in the afternoon. Their will to succeed. American football is a fascinating sport that keeps spectators on the edge of their seats. A. That's why firefighter humor is a tradition as old as fire . Your love gives me heartburn. Its always good to find out youre going to be working from home. Golfer: "I think I'll go drown myself in that lake.". After the great fire of London. 40 One-Liner Jokes That'll Crack Up Your Friends Best Life I got fired on my first day as a car salesman. (Closed), I Create Functional And Decorative Art On Functional Items That People Can Use Every Day, And Here Are My Newest 23 Works, Hey Pandas, What Are Your Most Useful Travel Tips? She asked Johnny if his dad was really a stripper in a gay bar and Johnny said "Absolutely not. A: It was already toast when they got there. A farmer call the rural fire department one day.He says, Come quick my barns on fire, my barns on fire!The dispatcher says, Calm down. Why did the moth want to be a fireman? My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. We Didnt Start the Fire. As a matter of fact, I started out the first three holes at 4 under par, including a eagle on the 3rd.. You can change your preferences. You dont want to know. What happened to the firefighter who wasn't doing well in his job? What is the type of award that one should give a firefighter? Firefighter Jokes: The Humor That's Kept Firefighters from Killing Each Other for the Last 350 Years. A: He heard there was a strike team. There are also campfire puns for kids 5 year olds boys and girls. Here are some of the best firefighter jokes thatll sure spark a laugh. Fire Jokes - Puns And One Liners And some of these descriptions are not retirement jokes! Firefighters are known for their positivity.This is because they always look at the brighter side of things! They will tell you. 33. (boxers are classed by their weight before fights). He ran to the open window and saw a fireman approaching on a long ladder. A: When they are FAST asleep. Q: Who rides a horse to every fire call? What would happen if Franciscan priests became firefighters? Who rides a horse to every fire call?The fire marshal. Flames. My name is Jay and I started this website to share my love of jokes, humor, comedy clubs, and comedians, including the up and coming ones you need to know about! A fireman is a person who works to extinguish fires and prevent them from spreading. 50 One-Liner Jokes Thatd Leave You Rolling. Whats the most important thing you could hope to remember if youre a firefighter? I wil Why doesn't the deputy firefighter look out of the window in the early morning?Because he needs to have something to do in the afternoon!